Your Coffee Is On Me :)

I really wanted to do something out of the box for my positive act of deviance.  I really wanted to make an impact on somebody's day and make it better for them.  But to be honest, I could not think of anything super original and I just did not have the time to come up with something really cool.  So, as original as it is, I bought the person who was behind me in line their coffee at Starbucks.  When I walked in I was actually really nervous.  I am an extremely friendly person, but not always to random people in stores.  I was worrying that maybe someone would not walk in after me, so I would not be able to buy them their coffee.  Luckily I walked in, and told the cashier that I wanted a Tall Skinny Vanilla Latte.  And right as I was  about to pay, an older lady came in line behind me, who i'm guessing was about fifty years old.  I told her, hey what are you going to get?  Your coffee will be on me!  She was so confused and asked if I was talking to her.  I told her yes with a smile on my face, don't worry I got you.  I gave the cashier $12 and told her the lady's coffee was on me and to keep the change for herself.  I then smiled at the lady and walked over to the other counter.  I got my drink, and told the lady to have an amazing day!  The lady said thank you to me a couple of times and said I was such a sweet girl.  As I was walking to my car, I could not stop smiling. It felt so good to do something out of the ordinary for someone, and I could tell the lady was shocked but she had a smile on her face and was really nice.  I know it was a small act, but I really hope it made a great start to her day.  And  even though if it is a small thing, maybe she will "pay it forward" and the chain of random acts of positive deviance will continue on and make everyone's day just a little bit better.  This act of kindness is not a norm in our society.  It is very rare to pay for someone else's purchase, especially that of a stranger.  I would love for this to happen to me, not because I would not to pay for something, but because it is something so unexpected and just a nice thing to do.  I think our society needs to think about that, that little things make a huge difference in someone's day.  Just saying Hi to random people in a store or street can make someone's day that much better.  

Female, Male, Both, Neither?

This week in class has been one of my favorite weeks so far.  This week really made me think and reflect about something that seems so simple-being masculine, feminine, or both. Although we watched a lot of videos in class, each and every one of them really made a clear point.  I personally, really liked the According to Gym episode.  The show portrayed males as pigs, conceited, forgetful, sexual, athletic, insensitive, rude, and competitive. The episode then portrayed women as the complete opposite of men making them, sensitive, talkative, social, concerned about weight, clueless about sports, and needy. This look at men and women as completely opposite goes hand and hand with what the narrator was saying in the movie Gender Codes. In Gender Codes they compare the way men and women pose for pictures.  Women tend to have canting postures, which include being off center, knees bent, leg(s) up, faced sideways, head tilt, and arms on the body.  These poses all put women is a position of being vulnerable, defenseless, and accepting submissiveness.  On the other side men pose completely different, with their head low, hands in the pockets or folded, and confident.  They are NEVER off balance or pictured laying down touching their face. The reason behind this is because if men were posed like women, the message of the add would come off as a homosexual add, which are extremely rare.  These poses along with what Goffman calls "ritualization of subordination."   These poses are how we perceive males or females to be because of the media, and gender codes.  As it turns out though, these codes have changed. Both men and women have become objects of desire for the opposite sex.  The physical appearance such as big chested, muscles, athleticism, and clothes have become what we want in our partner.  We want to have the most attractive spouse.  Because of this, as shown in Killing Me Softly, women and men want to look like the models shown in ads even though we know it is impossible because of all the editing.  Women think that men are judging women, but in reality the women are more judgmental than the men.  The media has effected our gender roles greatly, and as Cindy Crawford could not have said it any better, "I wish I looked like Cindy Crawford."

Poor Kids

The movie we watched was extremely interesting, yet disturbing.  I never really realized how much the media gears their products towards kids.  And it ends up that these products help make us who we are.  There are no longer just movies or TV shows, there are items that come along with them.  Kids are easily accessible to their favorite TV show's clothing, toys, lunch boxes, and snacks.  The marketing industry has realized that if kids really love a certain show, the kids will want anything associated with that show.  Kids want the stuff that is expense as well because they value expensive things such as designer clothes and high-end toys.  The Industry also is getting information about kids in a very creepy way.  They would film and observe children with their friends, in grocery stores, and while in the bathroom (shower and toilet).  I think this was morally wrong to basically stalk a kid just so you can take their money.   This really upset me.  And at one point in the movie, an interviewer was filming a  bunch of girls hanging out.  She told one of them about what she was doing and told the girl not to inform her friends about it.  This is teaching this poor girl at an early age to lie to her friends and not tell them everything.  Which in the end leads to being a bad and untrustworthy friend.  Another terrible thing about all this advertising for children is the images they feel they must portray.  For girls, they are to be sexy and pretty like the girls from Bratz.  This image leads to young girls wearing inappropriate attire and thinking at an early age that that IS how they are supposed to look.  For boys, they need to be tough and violent.  Boys are into their video games with tons of violence and think that is how they are supposed to act.  These images of boys and girls are making our youth conform in the exact same ways creating essentially violent and "slutty" girls. The marketing industry should not be so interested in these kids, it is wrong and creepy how serious about their jobs get.  They are supposed to be child experts, so why do they need to give them bad role models and essentially stalk them?

I'm Me

My family, mainly my mom and dad have socialized me.  What I have found out not only about myself but my family is something that I do not think about on a daily basis.  Right off the bat of me being born my parents, especially my dad, had high expectations for me. They wanted for me to live a happy and healthy life.  To be honest, I never really knew why as a child I was always participating in new sports/activities. I just thought it was normal to have gymnastics, softball, soccer, ice-skating, basketball, dance, reading programs, story time, park district classes once a week.  The real reason behind all of these activities was that my parents wanted me to find my niche.  They wanted me to figure out what I had a passion for and made me happy.  My dad wanted me to be an athlete, while my mom would prefer a more girly route like a dancer or skater.  Either way, they wanted me to learn what it was like to enjoy what I was doing.  Now that I look back at those years of my life, I am extremely happy I got to try basically every sport and I found the one I love- basketball.  They also really pushed the core values of my family onto me as well.  As I was interviewing my mom, I was shocked about some things she said.  I never really thought I looked or acted like my parents.  I always thought I was on my own boat doing my own thing.  As it turns out, my mom sees a lot of not only herself but my dad also in me.  This shocked me because I've never saw any of these qualities until she pointed them out.  She says I am like her by being stubborn and having a warm heart.  I am like my dad by having high expectations of myself and those close to me and being high maintenance.  Even though this was quite shocking to find out, it made me happy  that I have both my parents' characteristics.  My parents have made me, me.  In my family,  we do not have a lot of family traditions, but my mom would love for me to carry them on once I have a family.  All of traditions have to do with holidays.  One thing within only my family is that we have an "elf village."  After thanksgiving my mom, brother, and I set up our village.  Each year we get a new edition whether it is a house or accessory.  We have been doing this since I was a little girl, and I can not wait to "auction" off our collection between my brother and I, so we can start our own villages with our families.  Every Christmas eve, we celebrate with our immediate family and all gather together.  My mom really wants for me to stay close with my family and continue this tradition on.  The last thing my mom would love for me to carry on is my grandma's cookies.  On Christmas eve, my grandma gives us five coffee cans filled with her delicious cookies.  These cookies are made with "grandma love" and no one makes better cookies.  If you ask her to make them any other time of the year, she will automatically respond with no because they are for Christmas time only!  My mom wants me to start making them once I am older, and to keep the tradition going.  Overall, it is true that family is the most important socializing agent to making someone who they are.  If it was not for my parents, I would not have the passion I do for basketball, the personality I have, or the traditions my family carries.  

Sunnies?

My favorite part about summer is going to Summer Camp.  I have been attending/working at an overnight camp for the past seven years.  I absolutely love it.  One cool thing about camp is that we have counselors from all over the world including: Australia, England, China, Germany, South Africa, Ireland, Scotland, Mexico and Israel. All of these countries have completely different cultures and see things so differently.  One thing that is a huge boundary between all of us is how we speak.  Every country has slang words, but America has a lot that we do not really notice, as said in the article "Bemused in America."  My first year on staff, I was co-counselors with a girl from Australia.  She's been to America before, but with friends so she did not really know our slang terms. She referred to the garbage, as a bin, sunglasses were sunnies, bathing suits were bathers, flip flops were thongs, friend was mate, just to name a few.  I thought she talked soo strangely and I could not always understand her because of her accent and I did not understand some of the words she would use.  I realized I was being ethnocentric by thinking that she was talking strange because of how she talked and what words she used.  I was comparing our slang words to hers.  Using our culture as a basis to judge other people's cultures.  I ended up being extremely close with this girl, and she is now one of my best friends.  Yes, she lives in Australia still, but we keep in touch all the time.  I ended up picking up on some of her words, now I ALWAYS use the word sunnies instead of sun glasses.  You have to be open to other people's cultures and not be ethnocentric.  Or if you realize you're being ethnocentric, don't be because you can create a great bond with that person. 

What I've Learned...

I have already learned SO much from this course.  We have covered three main topics already: Sociological Mindfulness, Social Imagination, and the Social Construction of Reality.  By learning about these three things and by thinking like a sociologist I've been looking at things quite differently.  Sociological mindfulness is the practice of tuning-in on how the social world works.  While being sociologically mindful, I noticed that people easily feel awkward and unconformable. When someone or something is out of place, we as Americans try to avoid it, so we do not feel even more uncomfortable.  Sociological imagination is all about realizing the cultural meaning of the social sciences.  This weekend I was at my cousin's wedding, and a family member had brought our family tree that she has been working hard on for a long time.  In this HUGE binder, she had all the information on our family going way way back to my great, great grandparents.  She had pictures of everyone, and all this interesting information.  I got to see what my great grandparents looked like.  And to see how they dressed and what they did for fun.  In my grandmother's childhood, it was "cool" to have big hair and glasses, then my mother's age to wear high wasted pants, and then I get to see my generation like skinny jeans.  All of us were aware of our surroundings which made us, us.  I was able to draw these conclusions because I was using my Sociological imagination. The social construction of reality is how we interact with each other and look at each other's actions.  It's how we draw conclusions to things about other people. 

Overboard

This week, I really enjoyed doing the Abandon Ship activity. It was really interesting to see how my classmates chose to pick people to kick off the boat.  I was an observer, which I really liked.  Some of the things my classmates said were just straight down to the point and I agreed and disagreed with some of their decisions.  One of the first things said was, "the drug dealer needs to go" which I agreed with.  Because as Americans we value our positions in life, like jobs.  And this guy was a drug dealer for a living which was unacceptable to the people on the boat.  Another thing I noticed was that everyone was going against the old people.  To kick them off the boat.  If I was on the boat, I would of kept the old people.  They have a huge family and I couldn't imagine how upset their family would have been.  But our class is young, so being young we value our youth and the potential that the young people will bring to the world. As Americans we do value family, but only to a certain point. As a class we did value family when it came down to the football player and cheer leading pregnant wife that we decided to keep on the boat.  Overall, I noticed that Americans are selfish people.  Everyone was secretly looking out for themselves, weather it was not talking much or automatically picking others to kick off the boat.  I learned just from this activity that Americans value a lot of things in life, including, youth, education, usefulness, health, patriotism, morality, control, and individuality. I was able to tell all of this just by the people the class chose to keep on the boat.